Like, I love music. And if somebody came along and was like "hey, I like your stuff, I'm the president of Atlantic Records. I wanna sign you." Then I'd be down.
But the thing is, even if I was signed or whatever, I don't think I'd be happy.
Because I've talked to some very experienced and knowledgeable people in the music biz and a lot of it is whoring yourself off to the masses, compromising your creativity for what the general public likes, and putting up with dbag producers and managers who just want to use you to make money.
And that just doesn't seem like the kind of industry I want to get myself into. I wouldn't be able to deal with a life like that. I dunno. I'm still gonna play shows and maybe mail out demos to some labels I like, but I'm gonna leave it mostly in God's hands and keep looking for something that I really want to do for the rest of my life.
Because I'd really rather be a good father and a husband someday than be a payed musician. And to make money in the music industry I'd have to be gone a lot, and I'm not okay with that. I want to be an avid presence in my family's lives. So we'll see. I'm not really complaining or anything, it's just a revelation.
I think I've mostly just used music as a cop-out for not working hard in life. Like "I don't need an education, I'm creative!" And that's stupid. So I wanna try to work harder and get my feet in the ground so if one day I meet somebody really special, they won't be stuck with a loser who still lives with their parents and drives with no insurance and works at Zumiez twice a week. Just a thought.
But I dunno, maybe I'm just letting financial woes get the best of my dreams.
Quote of the day (and I feel is relevant and pertinent):
"The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation."
Henry David Thoreau
I found it written in an old notebook from highschool today and thought maybe I found it for a reason.
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