Streets be like "Feed me, feed me"

So I've been trying super hard to keep on track.

It hasn't been easy. But I've stopped drinking and smoking and partying and everything.

I've been clean and sober and living for God for a pretty long time now,

But today at my friend's house, his brother and some of his friends pulled out a scale and started bagging weed right in front of me. And then my friend who's been trying to quit was like "dude nobody sells 20/40 where i'm from in eastern washington, the cheapest you can get is 25/50. if you like pipelined your stuff you could make a HUGE profit over there." And they went on and on and on. And then the dude was trying to sell to me, and I was telling him I didn't smoke anymore.

And it just made me sad because like... I've cut out a lot of my friends, and I pretty much only hang out with people from church now.

But even at my friend from church's house, I can't get away from it.

So I guess this is God just saying "sooner or later, it's gonna be put in front of you and you're gonna have to say no". Which I did, and that's good.

But I hope it's a long time before I have to be put in that situation again.

It's just hard because I'm not dealing with white suburban kids anymore. Which is why I'm choosing this area to open my youth center in, because it's the place that needs it most. Right in the heart of parkland, midland, tacoma, lakewood, all the rougher parts of the area. These kids are seriously lost, and they need help.

It's actually really sad, I'll be hanging out at the skatepark with a bunch of kids, and an eight year old will come up to me and ask me to buy him cigarettes. Of course I say no, but that's still sad.

I dunno, it's just crazy growing up in Puyallup most of my life and now all of a sudden I'm thrown into this world full of kids with crackhead moms and absent fathers and brothers that are either in jail or on their way.

Probably at LEAST half of the kids at the skatepark are highschool drop outs, or are gonna be. It just makes me sad that these kids have no hope for themselves, all they have is skateboarding.

Which in turn has the potential to either keep you out of trouble, or get you in more.

Unfortunately, it seems as though the dark side is winning.